August 20, 2011

Hauntings.

Not by ghosts or spirits, but memories that are sometimes hard to take and sometimes welcome for a while. Still trying to get over the horrible nightmares that come with loss of any kind. But it will take time, patience and prayer.

I just wonder why I let people push me around sometimes. I think it is in my nature to try to make peace with people and to always think of how that other person must feel. The trouble with that way of thinking is I quite often end up getting burnt in some
way.

Since 2001, I have lost nine people close to me; including my Mom, Brother, Husband and Roommate and Friend. Quite a few of those close to me have terminal illness or conditions, and it is a matter of time before they are gone. I wonder why God doesn't prepare us for this earlier in life so it isn't so devastating every time it happens. The loss of the ones I love is the hardest part of my life to accept.



But almost as hard is the loss of home and possessions. I wonder why people, when they are involved in dealing with others don't think in terms of 'how would I feel if this happened to me?' or more towards the idea of 'treating others as they would like to be treated'. If we are put in a position to view someone as a friend or acquaintance one minute and a stranger the next; it is a wonder that we aren't all grasping, money grubbing and mean by nature.

We never get over the loss of someone we love or anything for that matter; but we can learn to live with it hopefully and not let it haunt us.



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